Phyllis Diller | GreatestTweets.com

All posts tagged in: Phyllis Diller

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Funny

Money’s scarce Times are hard Here’s your fucking Xmas card.
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Phyllis Diller

Dec 17, 2019

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Funny

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor.
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Phyllis Diller

Nov 27, 2019

26 Views

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Adulting

I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.
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Phyllis Diller

Feb 4, 2019

191 Views

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Adulting

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing.
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Phyllis Diller

Jan 16, 2019

193 Views

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