Browse Groucho Marx quotes and sayings.
I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can […]
From the moment I picked up your book until I put it down, I was […]
Look at me. I worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme […]
Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s […]
Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to […]
I was married by a judge I should have asked for a jury. Groucho Marx
Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife. Groucho Marx
I refuse to join any club that would have me for a member. Groucho Marx
I never forget faces, but in your case I’ll gladly make an exception. Groucho Marx
Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted. Groucho Marx
I’m leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it’s not raining. […]
The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve […]
She’s afraid that if she leaves, she’ll become the life of the party. Groucho Marx
The problem with doing nothing is that you never know when you’re finished. Groucho Marx
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and […]
When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A […]
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. Groucho Marx
While money can’t buy happiness, it certainly lets you choose your own form of misery. […]
All geniuses die young. Groucho Marx
Money will not make you happy, and happy will not make you money. Groucho Marx
Those are my principles, and if you don’t like them… well I have others. Groucho […]
If you’re not having fun, you’re doing something wrong. Groucho Marx
I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it. Groucho Marx
If you find it hard to laugh at yourself I would be happy to do […]
A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere. Groucho Marx
I’m not crazy about reality, but it’s still the only place to get a decent […]