Thank you, Stockings, for being a long flammable piece of fabric people like to hang […]
Whenever I’m stuck in traffic, I can’t help but wonder, ‘Where did the creator of […]
Thank you leaf blowers, for making me look like the world’s lamest Ghostbuster. I am […]
In New York, there are so many potholes, they’re like craters on the moon. That’s […]
Birthday: September 19th, 1974 Commemoration: N/A Nationality: American 45 Years Old Famously Known For Famous […]
Everyone looks so much better when they smile. Jimmy Fallon
Hey baby, do you like fine cooking? Cause you know what? I got Swanson’s Dinner […]
A new study found that most people can’t go 10 minutes without lying. But since […]
Be silly. You’re allowed to be silly. There’s nothing wrong with it. Jimmy Fallon
Thank you… Motion sensor hand towel machine. You never work, so I just end up […]
I like to see people laugh who are normally serious. Jimmy Fallon
The one thing you shouldn’t do is try to tell a cab driver how to […]
Don’t keep reaching for the star because you’ll just look like an idiot stretching that […]
You only think of the best comeback when you leave. Jimmy Fallon
You gotta risk it to get the biscuit. Jimmy Fallon
Have fun is my message. Be silly. You’re aloud to be silly. There’s nothing wrong […]
Oh, here’s an idea: Let’s make pictures of our internal organs and give them to […]