Joke Quotes, Joke One-Liners, Joke Sayings, Joke Memes, Joke Statuses and Joke Tweets!
To single out a particular group and say we can’t make a joke about them […]
After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. […]
My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what […]
From the moment I picked up your book until I put it down, I was […]
My father invented a cure for which there was no disease and unfortunately my mother […]
Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose. Garrison […]
To attract men, I wear a perfume called ‘New Car Interior.’ Rita Rudner
Recently my girlfriend asked me if I was having sex behind her back and I […]
Yesterday was the first day of the rest of your life… and you messed it […]
I’m not an atheist. How can you not believe in something that doesn’t exist? That’s […]
Nobody thought Mel Gibson could play a Scot but look at him now! Alcoholic and […]
One thing I’m going to miss about the pandemic is that it finally felt normal […]
What did Christ really do? He hung out with hard-drinking fishermen. Iggy Pop
I like American women. They do things sexually Russian girls never dream of doing – […]
Starting a church for parents where we pray for silence, our communion wafers are made […]
I dream of starting a three-man country trio called the Chixie Dicks. Zach Galifianakis
We went to Alaska once and they made us honorary Alaskans. Then we went to […]
This is a feminist bookstore. There is no humor section. John Callahan
Neurotics build castles in the air, psychotics live in them. My mother cleans them. Rita […]
It’s morally wrong to allow a sucker to keep his money. W. C. Fields
Describing comic sensibility is near impossible. It’s sort of an abstract silliness, that sometimes the […]
Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pickup truck, and […]
My wife says I am not ambitious enough. I suppose I could find someone more […]
I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat. Will […]
Look at me. I worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme […]
Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt. Because in every room he leaves […]
I think when people watch a lot of artists, they’re expecting this showiness, and I’m […]
If only my folks had beaten me, I could have gotten some material about my […]
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? Steven Wright
If you have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say Kool Whip […]
I’m callin’ you ugly, I could stick yo face in some dough and make some […]
Two old maids on a beach, streaker ran past, one had a stroke, the other […]
You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a […]
When God sneezed, I didn’t know what to say. Henny Youngman
I hate housework. You make the beds, you wash the dishes and six months later […]
If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead. […]
She said she was approaching forty, and I couldn’t help wondering from what direction. Bob […]
You cannot be a powerful and life-changing presence to some people without being a joke […]
I am so busy doing nothing… that the idea of doing anything which as you […]